I swore to myself I wasn’t going to post this list seeing as it contained the wishes of a child for Christmas. But then I also realized that up until I was 17 I got nothing but good wishes this time of the year because: we lived in a communist country where toys didn’t exist (well, [...]
I wasted half the day today watching a dog show and here’s my observation: If you spend a fortune on some mutt to make it look halfway presentable (…and trust me a lot of you are still grappling with this concept), wouldn’t it follow that you spend a bit more and make sure that the dog [...]
Behold the latest office memo: Dear Employee, Please be informed that any celebration of Valentine’s Day will not be tolerated. This “holiday” has Christian and pagan origins which I don’t support. For those of you unfamiliar with my Jewish faith, we actually celebrate romance and friendship on Tu B’Av which this year lands on August 9th. [...]
Auditorius Pestiferous: I see here that this check wasn’t cashed… Beatrix Kiddo: Right. It was lost in the mail so we put a stop payment on it and issued a new check. See the copy of the other check there? AP: Hmmm. Yeammm. Well, so there was another check issued, correct? BK: Yes. Exactly like I [...]
Zero to the Left: Beatrix, I’ve had a revelation! Beatrix Kiddo: (Great! What diminishing thing would I have to do today?) ZTTL: I think that investors don’t want to give us any more money because (you’re a duffus?) we don’t do a lot of P.R. … BK: (blank face) ZTTL: So you’re going to start [...]