VC Adventures of the Super-Harlots Club – Installment 2
Her Cuntness: Hi Beaaatrixxx (oh no, not the Southern drawl, y’all)
Beatrix Kiddo: Hey
HC: So I had a minor car accident this weekend…
BK: (Again?! What’s that? The seventh time this year?) Oh, what happened?
HC: I was like driving down the freeway and then all of a sudden I was in the lane for oncoming traffic and then my Prius got hit. Totally, not my fault
BK: How did you get to that lane?
HC: Well, the officer says I was intoxicated (qualudes, no doubt)…but that’s like so not true (sure it’s probably your guardian angel’s fault)
BK: Mkay…
HC: Anyway, could you make sure that the car gets to the mechanic and that the whole front half is replaced with new parts
BK: Isn’t it just easier to get a new car?
At this point I should have suggested that instead of the car she gets a jetpack. I could drive blindfolded, in handcuffs, and using only my feet through a farmer’s market and not hit as many things as this woman has in 2006. But operating little electronic controls on the jetpack is probably too hard as well. How about a football helmet and a leash? Now, that’s more like it.
