Smartassery

Cheap Suit Ill Tie Combo: Hi, my name is Earl and I would like to see the person who makes decisions about your services

Beatrix Kiddo: Oh, that’s strange Earl because I don’t have you in the calendar. Do you have an appointment?

CSITC: Err, not really but if could just see the person in charge of..

BK: Are you a solicitor?

CSITC: I’m not a solicitor. I’m a business man who has a lucrative business proposal for your company and I demand a bit of respect from you

BK: Look, I’m sure the Nigerian bank wire proposition scheme you’re dying to pitch is all the rage at whatever Russian whistle stop you two stepped out of but it won’t work here. Also I’ll give you as much respect as you afforded this office when you strolled past the 3 “No Soliciting” signs with your ailing costume and your floozy sidekick. Deal?

CSITC: Just give me the business card of whoever makes decisions in the office

BK: First off, this is not your wedding and you don’t get to tell me what to do. Second, you’re talking to the office manager, who incidentally is not interested on either what you have to offer or your decomposed manners. Third, I would now like for you and Ms. Tarty Thigh High Boots here to do like a tree and leave, lest I start poking eyes with this dull spoon

CSITC: So can I get an appointment?

BK: What do you think?!

CSITC: Fine but just to let you know, I will get an appointment

BK: I’d like to see you try. In the meantime why don’t you take that ‘tude down to The Golden Kitty Kat Club? I’m sure your polyester nightmare, querulous disposition, and not to mention Vixerenia over there will be snug like bugs in a rug. Don’t let the door hit you on your way out…it’s kind of heavy

PS: No sooner were they gone than the managing directors stepped out of the conference room where all this time they had seen me dealing with the dynamic duo through the glass partition: “Pshhh (insert puffy chest here), I was about come out and say, look buddy, you’re going to have to go.” Just as soon as it was safe, I guess. Pussies.  

This entry was posted on Friday, October 6th, 2006 at 11:07 pm and is filed under rants, Vapid Capital. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.